Europe is different.

From now on, please don't expect any souvenirs from my little vacations. Buying this shit takes an entire day and then the rest of the evening to figure out who gets what and how to pack breakable little trinkets that will sit in a drawer and little bottles of olive oil and regional liquors that will never be consumed.

And while I'm on the subject, don't expect to see any pictures. I am tired of spending my entire vacation taking pictures. I want to experience and enjoy what I'm looking at instead of worrying about capturing a picture so that my mom can say "oh that's gorgeous" or my dad can say "wow, neat!" It's bad enough worrying about camera batteries and carrying the camera itself around with me all day. I don't need the added pressure of having to take pictures of every monument, park, church, castle, interesting street scene, vista and body of water I encounter. (The ocean really doesn't look much different on the Portuguese coast than it does in Sea Bright, New Jersey.)

So, I am going to hire someone for my next vacation to a.) pack for me, b.) take photographs, c.) purchase crap for people. It would be sort of a vacation caddie. You must pay your own way, but you can take as much mineral water out of the mini bar as you please. Anyone in?

Now back to the reality of the United States where we consume way too much of everything. I love going to Europe for a variety of reasons: cultural, gastronomic, etc. But I really enjoy looking at all the interesting cars that we can't get here in the states. For instance, I saw a BMW 5-series without a sunroof and with *gasp* cloth upholstery. That's right. Cloth. Not leather. The horror, the horror! And contrary to popular belief, Fiats and Peugots are actually nice looking automobiles and people with hatchbacks don't seem any less happy in life than those with traditional sedans. Americans should take a look at their hideous gas guzzlers with wasteful gizmos and gadgets and lobby for more European cars to make it to the U.S. I would drive an Alfa Romeo or an Opel if it were available to me.

For those of us Americans that love European cars and are on a tight budget, we are pretty much limited to Volkswagens, which is not necessarily a bad thing. But why can't my Passat be available in diesel form here?* And why doesn't Audi offer Americans the right to choose a manual transmission in its A-6? And some people love the engineering of Mercedes-Benz, but could live without leather, wood and a navigation system. Why should they have to pay for those features just because that's all American dealers will order. We deserve more choices in America when it comes to automobiles.

Let's face it. Gas is still dirt cheap here compared to Europe. The only way Americans are going to start changing their driving and car buying habits is if gas, all of a sudden, went up to $10 a gallon, which isn't going to happen in the near future, but I kind of wish it did. Who needs a pickup truck if they're not hauling plywood around all day? And who needs an SUV when a wagon will do the trick? I'm not preaching about global warming or any of that shit; I just think the Europeans know what they're doing.

Time to practice my Fado (traditional Portuguese folk music).


*I probably wouldn't buy one, but it would be nice to have the option to do so.